Okay, so after sleeping on it, I've decided not to add any more text. A title might be nice, but even that may be superfluous. This baby is already text-heavy. I cranked out a guy smoking a cigarette, and I'll add that to the piece.
I haven't given Mark or Paul much time to comment (nor our millions of other readers), but I'll assume that there won't be too many changes that they suggest (and that I'd be willing to implement). I'll leave open the idea that the final product may change slightly, but we'll go with this for now.