Bindlestiff Family Circus

Victoria volunteered to help out with this show so she suckered me into going to it. Not that I didn’t have a great time: clowns, juggling, rope tricks, sword swallowing, an acrobat, sexy chicks on roller-skates and breathing fire, I mean what’s not to love? I brought JoAnn, in from TX, to see the show after having a delightful and bankrupting dinner at Nobu (where the waitresses are straight from a modeling agency’s casting call). True to our form we arrived at show time and luckily found the two seats together, which were almost perfectly middle centered. As I revealed in our good fortune I realized that I was surrounded by people I knew. Dvf and Sally were right behind us—and right in front of a pompous acrobat who I met some weeks ago who refuses to acknowledge my existence (you may be getting tons of ass due to ingraining yourself in a profession dominated by woman and gay men, but you are the true ass)—and I sat right behind the awesome acrobat Laura, who I should have recognized instantly, but apparently I have the memory of a gold fish, a fact made more apparent when I was having a balloon vagina made by a dominatrix who then said “You don’t recognize me do you, Mark?” Maybe my mind is simply shot in my old age, or maybe I was just bitter that, while I caught the stage debris that the juggler tossed into the audience, I didn’t win the raffle and one of the clowns/sword swallower stole a dollar from me. With the latter, I had known he was going to cut the dollar up to prove that the blades were sharp (What do the Freudian think of my thrilling at that?), but he complained that mine was too crumbled, took some others from the audience, and pocketed the extra. I confronted him afterwards and he proclaimed that I should have known better. Hey, if you can’t trust a carnie, who can you trust?! And as for the raffle, I packed it with multiple copies of the form that I filled out after stealing them from other people’s programs and even removed some of the competition’s by pocketing and promptly destroying them. I mean really, how much more cheating do I have to do?